1.The passion outweighed reality.
2.Taking people on face value.
3.Trying to be uncompromising on right or wrong issues.
4.Disproportionate growth expectations.
5.Throwing the cap in the air, and trying to reach it.The gap kills you.
Ironically enough,success happened, precisely for the same reasons,as the failures.Its a very thin line.But peer pressures also affected me.That should not have.
Today, as I look back, I have only gratitude,nothing else.The same shy guy,who was hesitant to get up and ask,is the guy, who is known to be brash,aggressive,extrovert, full of dash,is a serious contradiction.Perhaps a contradiction between what you are, what you became, and what you wanted to be.
But I still feel, its been an exciting journey.I am happy in my own way, to have significantly contributed to the society.Happy that, I did not bow down to extraneous pressures,and to the system.Happy that, I could keep pursuing my passion, in spite of all my struggles.
So,when you look back, you see a lot of small hills, a few hillocks, may be a few mountains, and also troughs,around,but I do not forget to see the stream which keeps flowing beneath me, all the time.it is cool, calm, quiet, and serene.It keeps bringing me back to sanity, and remind me of all the things, I still need to do,for people who love me,who stood by me, and for people who are less privileged than me, and where I can discover my healing factor,as I pass through.
Today I do not feel any compulsion to do anything, which I dont want to do.I want to be ,me,and not become anyone.This traverse is endless,smooth, and feels good.
Someday, all the things I contributed, built,and developed; all the values I imparted; all the honesty of purpose I demonstrated, may be, will come about to help a lot of people.I simply have no control on that. I wish that happens,though.
However,what I do have control on, is how I would lead my life,from now on.
That is where I am totally focused on.
4 comments:
"Ironically enough,success happened, precisely for the same reasons,as the failures"
this really sounds so amazing.
great to read your block....I always thought that you are very eloquent,and your blog confirms that.
Dipta
"Someday, all the things I contributed, built,and developed; all the values I imparted; all the honesty of purpose I demonstrated, may be, will come about to help a lot of people.I simply have no control on that." ...
Amen !!
It has been too long (5 months almost!!!) since you have posted on the blog.
Do post something new.
You have an analytical mind and abilty to modify your trajectory from your inner spirits that keeps you up and wining. Doyou know it inspires others also to run their life. So please come back and share your knowledge with us we are waiting for you.
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